Jon Acuff wrote a post called 100 Words: The gift & danger of friends. I checked, it is indeed 100 words on the nose. So I thought, “What would I say about friendship in 100 words?”
When I made friends in early adulthood, I didn’t think about the long-term.
I didn’t think, “These are the people who will walk with me as my parents die.”
It never occurred to me as I met my friends’ parents, “One day I will be with your child as they mourn, bury, and learn to live without you.”
Other than a friend whose dad died when she was a child, I was the first to lose a parent. This spring another dad died.
Though each path has to be walked alone, I am grateful we can walk besides each other.
This word, “friend” is bandied about today, somewhat casually. But friendship has made all the difference in my life. The loneliness of depression, the difficulty of marriage, shocking grief and debilitating loss — these might have done me in, but for my friends. Dear ones who hear my heart when they look at my face or hear the strain in my voice. They read me. They have stepped into dark places with me, and have not turned back. To help bear a load, to remember, to notice, to listen, to be present. What great deep joy to walk together in friendship.
First of all, good on you for 100 words! It’s fun to try, isn’t it?
But more importantly, these sentiments are so rich. Bear the load, to remember, to notice, to listen, to be present. Yes, that’s it!
Oh Amy. YOU have been the friend that has walked with me in darkness and hardship. Always faithful, always present, and always authentically you. Thank you for YOUR friendship. Love you.
Angie, you are so easy to be a friend to, but more than that, to have as a friend myself!! Much love back!!
Yes Amy… walking beside. Here is what I would say in 100 words:
Friendship is when we should be ready to step in a gap when we see a friend needs something; to stay in touch when not is easier, to offer presence at times when words would be hollow, to act without being called upon, to follow up when time has past but pain has not, to notice when they are not present, to check when something seems amiss, to love them with actions and not just words, to walk beside when walking is damn hard for them and to suffer, laugh, cry, smile, ache, and rejoice when they do the same.
Mark, I love this — you hold the long view in mind. These types of friendship are true blessings, aren’t they.
beautiful, Amy. Isn’t it interesting, when we have to be succinct, when the confines are drawn for us, that we are more careful in our choice of words.
Yours are perfect, poignant.
Jody, you are friend I have made in the last year and I am so thankful for you!!!
So beautiful!