Dear one,

When I returned to China after my study leave, we’d had three years together. Your older sister was able to write to me herself. Your younger sister, well, she was young enough that she could only hold onto the idea of me, but due to her age I faded from her. But you, you remembered me in your own four-year-old way.

When Valentines Day came you dictated the following to your mom:


Valentine then

And I wept when I read it.

I missed you too. And I love you. And part of me has also been waiting until I came home.

Your love, and the love of your sisters, never faded the way your Valentine did.

Valentine now

I knew it would fade, but I wanted to look at it every day and know that this call, though worth it, costs you too. So I hung it where it would be exposed to day light and not packed away, with false safety, in a drawer. Much like the love we share, exposed to the elements and not guarded out of fear. You hadn’t asked to be a part of this overseas life, you were born into it, yet you loved me wide and fierce none-the-less.

And today, today, your wait is over. I leave soon for the airport and as hard as it is to go, knowing you and others have been waiting, softens the blow.

I’m on my way back. Get those arms ready for a hug :).

Your crazy Aunt Amy

Leave A Comment

  1. Kristi June 25, 2013 at 6:46 am - Reply

    Love, love,LOVE the word picture of “false safety in a drawer” and “exposed to the elements and not guarded out of fear” and a love that is “wild and fierce.” This is TRUE love. Safe journey to you, Amy. :)

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      Amy June 26, 2013 at 10:54 am - Reply

      Kristi, I know you too are one who has boldly rejected safety but living an “out of the drawer” life :). Welcome to the elements, fellow traveler … so thankful not to be alone!

      • Kristi June 27, 2013 at 8:10 am - Reply

        Thanks for the encouraging comment. :) I’ve always loved rain and wind. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve taken walks in the rain or watched a storm from my parent’s front porch with the rain blowing in. It is good to have the Maker of the storm along side as well as fellow travelers to help you navigate through the rains and wind of a life not guarded out of fear. Good words, my friend.

  2. Nita Kulesa June 25, 2013 at 7:08 am - Reply

    Can’t wait to see you!

  3. JoDee June 25, 2013 at 8:15 am - Reply

    Aahhhh, crap….and now I’m the crazy aunt leaving and packing away those little reminders of the loves I’m leaving behind!! It just doesn’t ever get any easier….and now I’m crying!!

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      Amy June 26, 2013 at 10:56 am - Reply

      :) … no it doesn’t get easier. And here’s another one — Ms K grabbed my face last night and asked, “Aunt Amy, how long are you staying?!” — a long time, I replied. “At least 365 days?” Yes.

  4. Rhonda June 25, 2013 at 8:17 am - Reply

    Safe travels home Amy! All the best. hugs, from one crazy aunt to another. :)

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      Amy June 26, 2013 at 10:57 am - Reply

      I love that we are legion!

  5. Soundra June 25, 2013 at 10:51 am - Reply

    Have a safe trip. Hope to see you in Denver.

  6. Joy June 25, 2013 at 12:01 pm - Reply

    Beautifully expressed. By you and by Katy. Love to you as you travel through the months and years of re-entry. “Awesome” adventures ahead.

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      Amy June 26, 2013 at 10:59 am - Reply

      Thanks Joy :) … I know this is a process that will go on for a while and that there will be many faithful friends like to walk the path. Amy

  7. B June 25, 2013 at 7:02 pm - Reply

    Thank you for this. I teared up a little. I went through some love notes from my nieces yesterday. Your story, this story, is my story and their story too. I’m not home yet, but you bet there will be some gargantuan hugs when that day comes again.

    Enjoy the ones you love.

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      Amy June 26, 2013 at 11:00 am - Reply

      Great last word B … enjoy the ones we love. Yes! and more of that please :). (The hugs, they are something to delight in, I can say!)

  8. Elizabeth June 25, 2013 at 10:15 pm - Reply

    Safe travels Amy. So glad to find you again, and know we welcome you home in spirit and from not too far away Panhandle. We will make you Bronco bread when you are ready.

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      Amy June 26, 2013 at 11:01 am - Reply

      Sounds good Elizabeth! So glad to have reconnected with you too!!

  9. Mark Allman June 26, 2013 at 10:41 am - Reply

    I am sure that Valentines Day card faded right into your heart.

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      Amy June 26, 2013 at 1:05 pm - Reply

      Oh Mark, you know it! :) I can quote it by memory!

  10. […] post by Amy gave me the warm […]

  11. Holly June 26, 2013 at 11:50 am - Reply

    This is SWEET, Amy, and I’m so excited for you to be in the States with ones you love! Even with all the mixed emotion that this HUGE transition undoubtably holds…

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