It was the oddest sensation. We’ve all had it, an awareness of someone not liking us. Even in Eden, I don’t believe we’d be best friends with everyone. Here in Eden Lost we have been cursed with rejection that isn’t a mere rejection of an idea or dinner suggestion. But a rejection of who we are.
I didn’t realize that I was used to being liked by people around me until my teammate in China didn’t seem to like me. She tolerated me, worked with me, prayed with me, taught with me. But I didn’t sense she enjoyed me.
Again, this isn’t earth shattering news. Do you like everyone you know? I don’t.
The problem was … we were the only two on the team. Where do you go when the only other person from your culture doesn’t enjoy you? After one year together, I finally said, “I don’t think you like me and I’m not used to not being liked and I’m not sure what to do with that. And there are only two of us. Things aren’t bad being your teammate, but I don’t think I can take another year like last year.”
We worked hard on our relationship and revisited that conversation at least one more time. I do not blame my teammate! Can you imagine being teamed with someone for multiple years that you just don’t click with? It was no cake walk for her either.
In our stumbling, lunging towards and away from each other, we both were transformed and grown.
It was not the first time I had tasted not being accepted, but it went on the longest. As the days ebbed into weeks which bled into months, I was able to name what I was feeling. Rejection and insecurity in who I was.
Acceptance is about being seen, really seen, and not having to dress up or hide or pretend that you are more or less than you are. Think of all of the ways that acceptance is going to permeate Eden Regained – we will accept ourselves, we will accept each other, we will feel accepted and delighted in, we will have differences that won’t separate, instead they will differentiate.
And we will truly be acceptable! Maker of Eden, thank you for the reminder.
All the posts in the series will be added to this page each day of October. If you would like to receive these reminders in your email inbox, it’s easy! You can subscribe now by entering your email where it says “Jump into the Mess!” I am enjoying the journey together. Amy
Reminders: Love, satisfaction, extravagance, freedom, belonging, recreation, truth, trust, purity, submission and power, unity, kindness, blameless, with abandon acceptance.
The best kind of acceptance is when i don’t have to work for it! When it just comes because of who I am in Christ
So true! The already/not yet of it all, eh?!
Amy – well said. Thanks for opening up your life to all of us. Love you! Rock Chalk.
Wearing my RJCJ4L t-shirt right now :)! Love you too Kim! Amy
How weird that someone wouldn’t want to be on your team! I think you might be making up for the sake of the story. :-) I love how God used the experience in both of your lives though. Such a comfort that He doesn’t allow anything to be wasted.
Tis shocking, I know :) … but also not so much :). And Amen to nothing being wasted!!!
It is extra hard, I think when we are facing this challenges on the field. Just like you said, we don’t have a lot of friends from our own culture because we are living in someone else’s. Tough lessons.
They are … yet, in hindsight, I’m now thankful (I sure wouldn’t have said that in the middle of it!!)
Part of something I wrote after meditating on Psalm 143:8 Let me hear in the morning of your steadfast love
Let me hear
Your laughter as You delight over me because You made me me
Acceptance. Ahhhhh :)
Love that!!!