Quotation of the week Archives

31 reminders from Eden, Faith, Language of Eden, Quotation of the week

31 Reminders from Eden: PEACE

I hate you!

Screamed not from a stranger or a fan of an opposing team when you scored on them. No. Screamed from your child, directed at you.

My friends are entering the phase of having teenagers in their homes. Not all teens go through an “ugly” phase, but for those who do. It tends to be U.G.L.Y.

And no matter how many rationalization come with it (He was dumped by his girlfriend). And no matter how true they are (Her math teacher really IS a poor teacher). It hurts and sows discord in both heart and hearth.

I’ve worked with many a family in transition over the years and my number one prayer for them was Lord, may your spirit of peace rest on this family. May their home be infused with your peace in this time of transition. Amen and amen and amen and amen.

If only chaos, anxiety, and discord were relegated to the land of teenagers. It might be easily seen there because of the self-assurance and size of the “child” combined with the still oh-so-developing brain. But it’s in all our homes and lives to varying degrees.

I’ve written before about one of my favorite sayings from Paul, Grace and peace. And how we each need grace from God SO THAT we can have peace in our relationships with each other. Our relationships are to be marked by peaceful interactions.

Passing the peace wasn’t a part of the tradition I grew up in, instead we “greeted our neighbor.” I dread the moment every week – I get it is personal preference here. Is it more holy or appropriate to greet or pass? No. The difference, for me, comes on a soul level. When I greet, the ‘near introvert’ in me cringes. I find random “hellos” to people I don’t know, meaningless (I find, not it is) and I can’t wait to sit down or sing or do just about anything else, even leave.

When I pass the peace, my soul engages. On the surface it seems trite. Touch a hand and say, “The peace of God to you.” But I don’t have to know a thing about a person and they don’t to know a thing about me to know that we all can use more peace. When I am looked in the eye by a soul I don’t know and am told, “The peace of God with you.” So it is. And when it’s a soul I know and love deeply, all the more so. The peace of God with me.

Mother Theresa said, “Peace begins with a smile.” I like that.

Today, let’s be peace passers. Peace passers who look to that the day will come when hate will not be screamed at us.Instead, will be infused with peace and anxiety, discord and chaos will not be our story.

The peace of God to you.

All the posts in the series will be added to this page each day of October. If you would like to receive these reminders in your email inbox, it’s easy! You can subscribe now by entering your email where it says “Jump into the Mess.” Only two more reminders. Amy

Remember:Love, satisfaction, extravagance, freedom, belonging, recreation, truth, trust, purity, submission and power, unity, kindness, blameless, with abandon, acceptance, celebration, faith, generosity, joy, purpose, empathy, rhythms, hope, elation, esteem, healthy, peace. (Yup, still have the formatting problem :))

Book, Quotation of the week

How often do you interact with your rivals?

I became enamored with the (U.S.) Civil War and Abraham Lincoln in 10th grade when I was required to read The Killer Angels by Michael Shaara (author, not my teacher). In case you’re not familiar with it, it recounts the Battle of Gettysburg and since then I’ve probably read another ten books or so related to Lincoln or the war. In December I saw (and loved) the movie Lincoln. Thanks to the credits I saw it was based in part on Doris Kearns Goodwin‘s biography Team of Rivals: The Political Genius of Abraham Lincoln.

If you haven’t seen the book, it’s 754 pages of text (not that I checked, oh say, 754 times how long it was) with an additional 162 pages of notes and references. This is a book I’ve meant to read for ages but haven’t for all of the ~~reasons~~ excuses you can imagine. However, seeing Lincoln and knowing there is no way that I am hauling that book across the ocean twice, it was time to either put up or shut up.

Once again, I am grateful for sitting at the feet of history, and President Lincoln in particular as I read this page turner. Generally speaking, you can guess what the book was about, so no surprises there. However, Lincoln provided four takeaways that are timeless when it comes to interacting with people.

1. The importance of a comprehensive view. There is a reason this book is 754 pages! It starts with the background of the four candidates for the Republican party and goes to the assassination of Lincoln. Though I’ve read fairly extensively on the subject, because the topic is so massive, many books focus on one aspect. That is fine and good! But this book reminded me of the importance of taking the time to get the full story and the difference it can make when it comes to interacting with people.

2. The importance of timing. Lincoln understood that he couldn’t rush too far ahead of people and expect them to stay with him. He was patient and had the long view in mind. He knew when to wait, when to nudge, when to call in a favor, when to cast vision, and when to insist. Just because I might want a person or situation to be at a certain point, at times the better question isn’t “are were there?” but “do I know where we are headed? and am I willing to take the long view?”

3. The importance of knowing when to cut your loses. President Lincoln was not perfect and sometimes trusted people when it was clear that they had consistently violated his trust. General McClellan was such a man and because Lincoln wasn’t able to remove McClellan earlier than he did, it cost both sides dearly as that decision prolonged the war and resulted in the death of thousands. Sadly, and paradoxically, not all people or relationships are equal. If trust has repeatedly been violated, it’s time to evaluate the amount and type of interactions to have.

4. By far the greatest lesson for me was the importance of building a team of rivals. I mentioned that Goodwin begins the book with a look at the four Republican candidates; she did this because Lincoln invited all three of the to be a part of his cabinet. He built one of the most diverse cabinets with former Whigs, Democrats, a range of views on State vs. Federal rights, and views on slavery and post-war reconstruction.

I have been challenged by how many “rivals” do I work with (or truly know, for that matter). Rivals in the sense of have different ideas, but still willing to work together. Lincoln’s cabinet was no gathering of yes men or women. They all knew where the buck stopped, but they also knew that as a group they were better for their diversity. I know that “diversity” is a bit of a buzz word now and I hesitate in using it. That being said, I truly believe it is important to know, interact with, and love those who may be “rivals,” and especially at work.

I’m wondering what other gems I’m missing out on by avoiding books because of their size!

Have you read Team of Rivals? Which of these four is the hardest for you? What book have you putting off reading?

Book, Personality, Quotation of the week

Do you have an H of G? {and if not, you should}

Last month I read Mountains Behind Mountains by Tracy Kidder. It is part biography (of Paul Farmer), part social commentary on fighting disease among the poor (especially TB), and part a good swift kick in the pants. Like the boy scouts, we can all leave our neck of the woods better than we found it.

What will stick with me long after Paul Farmer fades is his H of G.

Yeah, that’s what I thought. His what? Tracy was asking Paul if he was doing something basically to earn merit or was he trying to cheat to get merit.

“Depends of whether of not you have an H of G for the endeavor,” he said, without looking up.

“An H of G” was short for a “hermeneutic of generosity,” which he defined once for me in an e-mail: “I have a hermeneutic of generosity for you because I know you are a good guy. Therefore I will interpret what you say and do in a favorable light.

Hermeneutic of Generosity might be a bit of a mouth full, but it’s made me look at my own hermeneutic of interpreting other’s words and deeds.

Now don’t get me wrong, it’s not wise of approach every person and situation with an H of G; but how about most?

I like the idea of having an H of G as a primary setting for those close to me instead of an H of S or D (suspicion or doubt). Helps me to roll with the normal bumps of that come with being sinful and responding sinfully, infusing grace into my thoughts and interactions.

Does an H of G come easy to you?

Book, China, Learning lessons, Quotation of the week

Who invented the coffee cup? {The answer might surprise you}

The truth is I don’t know. But after reading The Man Who Loved China by Simon Winchester you, too, might find yourself wondering about your morning mug as you wait for water to boil.

The Man Who Loved China is part biography, part history, part science, and wholly interesting due to Winchesters engaging writing style.

Joseph Needham was a brilliant Cambridge professors whose eccentricities included an open marriage and being used as a political pawn. He met Lu Gwei-djen in 1937 and in addition to becoming enamored with her, he fell for her country, China. He first visited in China in 1943 at the height of WWII and as he traveled around discovered that China had been advanced in virtually every area until the 1500s when she shut herself off from the world.

In the 50s he started a project entitled Science and Civilisation in China that he thought would be a comprehensive tome. Let’s just say he was a little off as there are now 24 volumes! Think Oxford English Dictionary or Encyclopedia Britannica.

Enjoying some nice moxibustion and yes, that is a lighter near my face

The appendix lists Chinese inventions and discoveries and gives the earliest recorded date. Some are as you’d expect (abacus, chopsticks, gun powder, or Great Wall), but not all. For fun, here is one item from each letter and the amount of entries for each letter. Not everyone is as into math as I am, so I really did limit myself from listing all things math. {You’re welcome.}

A (15) – antimalarial drugs (3^rd century BC)

B (24) – bookworm repellent

C (28) – crossbow (5^th century BC)

D (16) – decimal place value (13^th century BC)

E (6) – ephedrine (2^nd century AD)

F (9) – folding chairs (3^rd century AD … thus my morning cup wondering)

G (15) – gluten from wheat (AD 530)

H (10) – handgun (AD 1128)

I (2) – indeterminate analysis (4^th century AD)

K (2) – kite (4^th century BC)

L (4) – ladders, extendable (4^th century BC)

M (27) – moxibustion (cupping, 3^rd century BC)

N (4) – negative numbers, operations using (1^st century AD)

O (1) – oil lamps, economics (9^th century AD)

P (32) – “pi,” accurate estimation of (3^rd century AD), placenta used as a source of estrogen (AD 725), playing cards (AD 969) {P was too interesting for just one!}

Q (1) – qin and se zither

R (10) – reel on fishing rod (3rd century AD)

S (36) – smokescreens (AD 178), stirrup (AD 300)

T (8) – thyroid treatment (1^st century AD), toothbrush (9^th century AD, really?! Let’s not think of mouths before that)

V (1) – vinegar (2^nd century BC)

W (10) – weather vane (120 BC)

Z (1) – Zoetrope (AD 180, mechanical toy. I had to look it up)

I know! Pretty interesting list with a little something for everyone. The Man Who Loved China will open your eyes, entertain, and educate. Get it, and that’s not just a smokescreen ploy (which, by the way, would not have been a great line prior to AD 178!)

Which jumped out at you? Please share in the comments, I really am curious :).

Cross cultural, Family, Personality, Quotation of the week

Would you rather watch whales or Amish? {I know, tacky question)

In preparation to visit my friend Lisa, she found several fun options for us through groupons. One day I’d get an email along the lines of Hey would you like to go whale watching? And the next day the question might be would you like to rent motor scooters and ride through Lancaster, PA looking at Amish?

The answer to both was, of course! But we knew we couldn’t say yes to all of the fun things we wanted to do. I remember responding along the lines of “I’d love to do both, but if I have to choose, what does it say about me that I want to ride a scooter and look at Amish? Doesn’t that seem a bit voyeuristic and somehow just … wrong.”

We got over the awkwardness and had a great day

Like many of us English (anyone non-Amish), I have a strange fascination with the Amish. And after our day in Lancaster, I also had a major sugar high! We scooted from stand to stand enjoying whoopie-pies (oh my word, Jesus could greet me with one of those), homemade lemonade, ice cream, and pretzels. After our first stand we decided to forego “sensible eating” and just enjoy. And we did! It was my first and only time to truly interact with an Amish person and to in small, very small, ways break down some of the stereotypes and see them as people and not just “the Amish.” So when I was visiting a friend in the hospital after she had given birth and I saw the book Growing up Amish by Ira Wagler, I was tacky enough to ask a new mother if I could borrow it when she was done.

Thankfully, though a mother of two young’uns, she finished the book lickity split and gave it to me Wednesday when her son stopped by to trick-or-treat. I handed him a piece of candy and she handed me a book. Best. Trade. Ever.

If you have ever had a fascination with the Amish (or really, a passing curiosity), get this book and then hope for weird weather (in my case two days of rain in Beijing, a land known for being a desert). While this isn’t going to become classic literature or a book you need to read repeatedly, it is a peek into broad world of the Amish.

Ira was an active, albeit restless, member until he left for a fourth and final time when he was 25. He paints and fair picture without poking fun needlessly, elevating himself, or mocking those who stay. Instead, it is a look at someone who wrestles with wanting to be part of a community in which he never felt fully himself. In the end he found the gracious love of God that enabled him to move beyond the truth he had been taught about salvation.

What have you been reading recently? Anybody else eaten a whoopie pie? Am I right or what?!

Book, Learning lessons, Quotation of the week

One of the few poems I’ve memorized {and winners announced}

In high school I was assigned the poet ee cummings in an English class. Much to my mother’s sadness, I’ve never been much into poetry, but ee was a poet I could kind of get into.

I love the simplicity and visual beauty of this one:

l(a

le
af
fa

s)
one
l

iness

{A leaf falls, inserted into loneliness. }

There were many “leaves to pick from”, leaving many of you lonely without a prize. The two winners are:

Ben W (previous subscriber)

Livingoutfaith (new subscriber)

I’ll be contacting the winners in an email with details! Thanks to all for subscribing and passing on the word.

What poem do you think of in the fall?

Book, Quotation of the week, Travel

With coarse speech, coarse food, coarse everything {Sound like your home?}

I love a good gift shop and am willing to buy something that doesn’t smell of “you can get this anywhere.” Rocky Mountain National Park (near Estes Park), has such a gift shop in their visitor’s center, so, a friend and I each bought a copy of A Lady’s Life in the Rocky Mountains by Isabella Bird.

Isabella was a British woman who spent the summer of 1873 going all over the state of Colorado. She was quite the explorer and was on her way home from the Sandwich Islands (Hawaii); the book resulted from letters to her sister of her time in Colorado.

Isabella’s journey was 800 miles long, and much of it on the back of a borrowed bronco named Birdie. I spent part of my summer driving various friends around Colorful Colorado, same, same, but different.

a few excerpts:

All the women work in this region, so there is no fuss about my working, or saying, “Oh, you mustn’t do that,” or “Oh, just let me do that.”

Same. This is one of the things I love about Colorado.

Upon arriving in Fort Collins, a military post, she wrote, “The settlers have ‘great expectations,’ but of what? These new settlements are altogether revolting, entirely utilitarian, given up to talk of dollars as well as to making them, with coarse speech, coarse food, coarse everything, nothing wherewith to satisfy the higher graving if they exist, nothing on which the eye can rest with pleasure, The lower floors of the inn swarms with locusts in addition to thousands of black flies.”

Wow. That’s a strong opinion! Coarse everything? I hope she’d describe Ft. Collins with other words today.

I must take up my narrative of the nothings which have all the interest of somethings to me.

Same, regardless of who you are or what time period. Our narratives are made of nothings, but they have all the interest of somethings to us!

An American is nationally assumptive, an Englishman personally so.

She said this several times. Again, this was in 1873, long before much of the modern history that has formed both cultures, so maybe what forms us goes deeper than we realize.

While I’m not sure that everyone will want to run out and buy this book, it offers a gentle reminder. It is a rare treat to see that land you are so familiar with and feel a part of, in an earlier form. These kinds of books exist for all places, but aren’t flashy and forward thinking, so they are not likely to jump out at you. Go looking for one from your neck of the woods, I’m sure it exists, and read it this year.

Amy’s interaction with nature. Not quite like riding a bronco for hundreds of miles, but it’ll do!

What had captured my eye?

Really, you have to understand how unusual it is to have a marmot this close!

What gems have you stumbled upon in recent months?

Faith, Learning lessons, Quotation of the week

Jesus could greet me with a half-pint of this

The subtitle claims that it is “a biography of the beer that changed the world.” I love combining unusual things like biographies and beer, but what got me even more were the two elements combined in the title. God and Guinness. In the circles I grew up in, alcohol wasn’t taboo (after all Jesus made wine and my parents drank socially), but it was viewed as something not really discussed because the subject could be divisive.

The full title is The Search for God and Guinness: A Biography of the Beer that Changed the World by Stephen Mansfield. Though I’d heard of Guinness, I had the typical American ignorance of the Irish company.

Sitting outside the Guinness archives, a pair of teens asked Mansfield why Guinness is so famous.

I launched into a brief, informal survey of Arthur Guinness, his descendants, and the amazing thing that Guinness had become. But I kept the focus on the bear, and this, I quickly realized, was a mistake. I knew I had not captured them… I told them how the Guinnesses were people of faith and how this faith moved them to do good in society. I recounted the deeds of Arthur Guinness –the righteous use of wealth and the Sunday schools and the anitdueling association and his stand against extravagant living. I spoke also of the later generations and the high wages they paid their workers and the restoration of Ireland’s historic landmarks and the huge gifts to build housing for the poor… And I told them how nothing they have read about Microsoft or Google compares with the way an Irish beer company cared for people when their grandparents were still young.

The longevity of the benevolence impressed me. It wasn’t merely one Guinness that used his or her power and influence for good, but generation after generation starting in 1759. How many companies can say that?! You’ll have to read the book for the specifics, but I believe you will be impressed.

In the final chapter Mansfield asked What might we learn from the Guinness tale that we can emulate?

Discern the ways of God for life and business
Think in terms of generations yet to come
Whatever else you do, do at least one thing very well
Master the facts before you act
Invest in those you would have invest in you

That’s a list anyone can print out and review occasionally, isn’t it? I’ll also throw in two interesting tales. When Samoset first approached the Pilgrims in March of 1621 and greeted them, I don’t know which they found most surprising, that he was (in their words) stark naked with only a loin cloth, greeted them in perfect English, or that his very first question was if they had some beer. Next Thanksgiving, any American out there, choose two of the three to celebrate the day, I’ll let you pick!

Second, The Guinness Book of World Records comes from these Guinnesses! What started out as a “pub-game book” turned into something much bigger.

The night I finished the book I ordered half a pint at dinner and lifted my glass to the positive influence a company can have. I didn’t really like the taste, but if Jesus wants to greet me with half a pint instead of a Thai iced tea or Diet Coke, I will gladly accept it.

What companies do you like because of their positive contributions?

Book, Cross cultural, Learning lessons, Quotation of the week

Four must-reads for anyone interacting with others (part one)

I really wanted to title this Four must-reads for cross-cultural work, but I was concerned that some of you would see the word “cross-cultural” and think “well that’s not me” and move on. But wait! Do you know anyone with a different religious view than you? Grew up using different utensils for eating? Is from a different part of your country? Might not support the Denver Broncos? (Shocking, I know.)

We all are blessedly cross-cultural. Surprisingly, in China some of the greatest cultural difference for those working on a team have come not from the Chinese (because we expected those) but from fellow Americans from different parts of the country.

Books are a wonderful way to fall into another world and see things in ways we might have missed. Here are four must-reads when it comes to cross-cultural themes. They cover the broad spectrum of cross-cultural experiences: bad, innocent, good, and true.

1. The Poisonwood Bible by Barbara Kingsolver – Placed in Africa, this story chronicles a family of six moving as missionaries to a village. The story is told through the voices of the wife and daughters with the father prominent in the story. Kingsolver’s ability to capture the uniqueness of each female is some of the best writing ever. Be warned, you may want to scream at times.

2. The Sparrow by Maria Doria Russell – While living in the US several years ago I attended a book group that without fail, no matter what they were discussing referred back to “Priests in space.” I knew it was a must read. Russell wrote this in response to Columbus’ 500 year anniversary. Many were critical of Columbus and she wanted to remind us that people of that era came with the best of intentions and did not intend for it to go so poorly! A group of Jesuit priests go to another planet to observe two species; they took great pains to alter nothing, become involved in nothing, and return home leaving no “footprints.” (Disclaimer: one part is not easy to read, but that’s true of cross-cultural work too!) Children of God is the follow-up book when the main priest is forced to go back, allowing for many confusions to be answered.

3. City of Tranquil Light: A Novel by Bo Caldwell — Will and Katherine moved to Guang Ping Cheng, China in 1904 where they lived for the next 20 years. Burying their only child, living through famine and war, setting up a clinic and school and starting a church — a picture of the dance between seeing amazing things happen among very ordinary and hard times.

4. Tattoos on the Heart: The Power of Boundless Compassionby Gregory Boyle (True story) This book makes me want to be a better person. Period. Anyone who can take working with gang members and ex-cons and some of the most tragic situations and find The Light and the light side is someone I want to follow. Father Greg consistently challenges the deeply rooted belief that some lives are not as valuable as others. There is also a beautiful chapter on success and failure and what they look like when you are working with people … things are messy!

(Bonus book: Fieldwork: A Novel by Mischa Berlinski). In part two, I will share a few things I’ve learned living cross-culturally.

What books would you add to the list?

Part two here

Book, Quotation of the week

Ruthlessly eliminate hurry

Let’s play Jeopardy. Here is the answer: “You must ruthlessly eliminate hurry from your life, for hurry is the great enemy of spiritual life in our world today.”

What was the question?

John Ortberg asked Dallas Willard what he would recommend to bring new energy to his spiritual life.

We have come to the final month in 7: An Experimental Mutiny Against Excess by Jen Hatmaker (months one through six here, here, here, here, and here). She ended with an easy one: stress.

Cue the nervous laugh.

As she said, it’s easier to wear one shirt over and over than to reduce stress in a world that bombards us with more. More opportunities, more ways to waste time, more books to read, shows to watch, music to listen to, tasks to do. We cram and we cram and we cram more in to our days and schedules and then use our favorite word: busy. Jen wanted to pray seven times a day. Have I mentioned that it’s easier to wear the same shirt over and over?

Shaken up river water. That’s how Ruth Haley Barton’s mentor described her. In Invitation to Solitude and Silence Barton explained how she had to learn the importance of learning to sit — even for ten minutes a day– to let the river water of her soul settle a bit.

Ruthless eliminate hurry. Let the shaken up river water in my soul settle.

I can picture this so easily because I can resemble it so closely it’s eerie.

This whispers to me, letting me know that while I can’t control all the junk (and good stuff) that life is going to throw at me, I do not have to jump like Pavlov’s dog salivating at a bell. Long conditioned to the messages to, be, cram more in, God knew what he was up to when he blessed the seventh day. All of the other days he called ‘good’ or ‘very good,’ but this one he blessed.

Small practices of sitting, reading, meditating at ten minutes a pause can be enough to slow me down to hear from God. In our all-or-nothing cultural messages, we find it hard to believe that moments of rest and silence can be woven into our day.

So, here we come to the end. How has it gone? Well, I didn’t part with all of the pairs of shoes I said I would. BUT I did move other pairs along for the same total number of pairs. I have cleaned out four drawers and have helped two men in Cambodia with loans through Kiva.org (go there right now. Stop reading and go to Kiva. And family members, I hope you like getting loans for birthday and holiday presents!). I don’t mean for this to be “I did this” or “Look at how great I am.” I really didn’t do much, my point is, if I read and preach and then show NO change in my behavior, I’m like a clanging gong and not a church bell that links me to a world much greater than me.

And there in lies one of the greatest lessons of the book. John 3:30 come to life. He must increase, but I must decrease.

What is one thing you’ve done in response to this series?

Photo by Micheal W. May