The Messy Middle

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China, Cross cultural, Faith, God, Learning lessons

Deeper and wider than my small arms

One of the highlights of last week was your response to Book Cousins. Thank you for jumping in with sharing where you have seen God at work. The winner was notified, but to entice you to buy The Bells Are Not Silent, today go bell hunting with Joann and me. This was first published in September 2012.

Remember the song Deep and Wide? I belted it out as a kid, complete with hand gestures and humming words as we sang it faster and faster. “Deep and hmmm, Deep and hmmm!” Through song and laughter the breadth and depth of God’s love drilled into us as we sang in Sunday School.

I shared last weekend that Joann and I were going to Harbin to research church bells. She’s the actual researcher and I am the side kick. She became interested last spring in Chinese church bells we have traveled to Qingdao, Tianjin, and Harbin. We’ve also visited the bell museum and various churches in Beijing.

These trips have shown me that my view of the Bride of Christ has stayed about as far as I can open my arms to show how “deep and wide” the church is. Um, that is to say, pathetically small.

Part of it is just the reality that we can’t know what we haven’t been exposed to. Part of it is that history has kept different part of Christianity separated. Part of it is just that I forget how truly amazing God is.

Through these trips, God takes my arms and pulls them apart, experience by experience widening my view of vastness of the church.

In the stretching, there are moments of comical “what should we do” and a bit of mild awkwardness. When a Catholic brother and sister asked us in their sanctuary if we could pray together we said, “of course!” and started to do the Protestant huddle only to realize we were going to stand in line facing the cross. In the Orthodox Church we forgot to bring head coverings and I had to keep reminding myself to back out of the church and not turn my back on the cross.

But the most holy-ground- surreal-ness of “is this really happening” comes in meeting people and seeing how beautiful the bride can be.

At the Russian Orthodox Church scheduled to meet a contact at 10 a.m. and had been told that church didn’t like Protestants or Americans, so try to speak Chinese.  We met utterly delightful Russians and as they realized we truly were interested in them, the bell, and their history, they repeatedly thanked US for caring about their history and trying to preserve it. My friend wrote more about the experience and about the bell. You should read what she wrote!

When our motley crew of Chinese, Russians, and Americans was finally allowed up into the bell tower, we were all in awe as we looked at an 1800s Moscow bell in an Orthodox church in a Chinese city being researched by an American.

We entered with those labels, but we exited one radiant bride. Humbled by the thought that God uses the likes of us.

Deep and wide. Deep and wide.  May our understanding of how truly deep and wide expand far beyond our fingertips.

I loved the responses to last week’s question: Where have you seen God at work? So, this week. What songs were popular when you were a kid? I’ll share a few I remember in the comments.

Community, Faith, God, Learning lessons

What does your coach say to you in the middle of the game?

Sometimes a pumpkins stays a pumpkin

Can you imagine being Perry Ellis? I can.

If you have no idea who Perry Ellis is, he’s all of us, because he is living a beautiful, messy story. He’s a Kansas kid who was so talented in basketball his high school team had to rent the larger, college court when he played. Okay, so maybe he is not exactly like me. No one rented larger auditoriums to hear me debate in high school.

In a sport that is known for showmanship and volume and tattoos, Perry has a receding hairline, is mild mannered, and I think might call me Ma’am if we met. (When what I’d want him to say is, “Yeah, we can be friends and it wouldn’t be weird AT ALL middle aged woman.”)

Perry is a senior at the University of Kansas. Last year he decided not to go pro and spend one more year at Kansas. He is the heart of the team, scoring in double digits with a calming, leading presence on the court.

I admit to tearing up on senior day as I saw him (on TV) walk to center court with his mom and dad.

Saturday night the Jayhawks played Villanova for a spot in the final four. Perry had a terrible first half. Terrible. He did not score one point. We have all been there. A terrible day at work or with your kids or in your marriage. When no matter what you do, you cannot for the life of you, get a shot to fall.

And then mercifully half time came.

What would his coach say?

This is where we are all Perry Ellis.

What do you long to hear from your Coach mid-game, when the outcome of a situation isn’t a given?

Coach Self said to Perry Ellis, “You will always be loved at Kansas. You have the chance to do something special tonight, but you will always be loved.”

If the “something special” had happened and the Jayhawks won, what a Cinderella story, right?! But sometimes the pumpkin stays a pumpkin and it did for Perry. He scored a few points in the second half, but nothing impressive and the Jayhawks lost.

You will always be loved. The heartbeat of the coach’s message wasn’t about performance, it was about love and presence.

Is the pain of the loss still raw? Of course. Perry may be mild-mannered, but he’s not dead. I still feel the loss and I was miles away!

Love does not negate pain.

But pain rooted in love can lead to life.

Pain rooted in performance can lead to death.

I hate that we lost. But when the announcer shared what Coach Self said, I knew I needed to pay attention.

You will always be loved at Kansas.

It is true, Perry Ellis, you will always be loved at Kansas. As one small Kansas voice, I add: I love you. I love how you went counter-cultural and stayed in school. I love how calm you are. I love how generous you are with your teammates. I love how you’ll get that twinkle of a smile when a play is a work of art. I love how you know you are part of something bigger than yourself. I love that you are honorable and shared that honor with the team. I love that you will always be a Hawk.

God—the one who see who you really can be and wants to coach you towards that person step by step—starts his coaching with the same heartbeat. You will always be loved in the Kingdom.

It is true, Player in this Game of Life, you will always be loved in the Kingdom. It is the middle of the game and maybe you are down. It does not matter to your value to the team. You will always be loved in the Kingdom.

Amen and Amen.

31 reminders from Eden, Community, Faith, God

Control and the Garden Of Eden

False Dichotomy

“Control” was the theme of the week at Velvet Ashes and one of the blessings has been to remind me that God is in control. That he did not merely put the world in motion and then step away, leaving us on our own to figure our way through the muck.

As I was thinking about how God is in control and what my life might look like if I had control, I sensed the whisper of the Spirit say, “But it’s not an either/or. You have set up a false dichotomy: Either God is in control or you are. You both are.”

Wait, what?

We are part of the Imago Dei—the image of God. In the Garden of Eden, before brokenness, distance, and sin entered the story, Adam and Eve lived being an Image Bearer perfectly. God revealed how my thinking about “control” has been influenced by The Fall. Living, as we do, in Eden Lost, all we have seen and experienced has flavoring from the fall. But the hope of the Gospel is that the Kingdom of God can be here and now—and that also involves how we use control.

Having and handling control rightly is one of the ways we are Image Bearers. 

In the garden we are told, “So the Lord God formed from the ground all the wild animals and all the birds of the sky. He brought them to the man to see what he would call them, and the man chose a name for each one. He gave names to all the livestock, all the birds of the sky, and all the wild animals.”

I cannot wait to get to Heaven and ask God if I can see this scene. But until then, we can picture it. God forming animals and bringing them to Adam, dare I say, eager to see what he will call them? Excited to share in this moment with Adam and see what Adam will name the animals.

What stood out to me this time was the scope of this scene. It wasn’t God made an animal, Adam said, “It’s a cow.” God made an animal, Adam said, “It’s a blue heron.” God made an animal, Adam said, “It’s a tiger.” End scene.

No!

The Lord God formed from the ground all the wild animals and all the birds of the sky.

Emphasis obviously added. Control starts with God (and I’m going to call this “Capital C” Control). God is the one who makes animals out of the ground! God brought them to Adam to see what he would call them. God did not bring the animals to Adam and tell him what they were.

He brought them to the man to see what he would call them.

Part of being an Image Bearer is having control (“Small C” control).

Look what’s next. The amazing vastness of this control we have been given.

The man chose a name for each one. He gave names to all the livestock, all the birds of the sky, and all the wild animals.

Again, emphasis mine, but the words are God’s. (God and I are sharing Control, control). Adam chose a name for each animal. Each. Not some. Not God saying, “That’s a dumb name” or “Hurry it along.” Adam had control of a task and the way he chose to do it.

This all sounds exciting and fist pumping the air and wow! Then I think about the task.

All the livestock. All, not some. Not just the pigs, chickens, cows, showing my lack of agricultural knowledge.

All the birds of the sky. All, not some. Not just the robin, blue jay, sparrow, and hawk, showing my lack of bird knowledge.

All the wild animals. All, not some. Not just the panda, tiger, and elephant, showing my lack of wild animal knowledge.

We are not told in the text how many animals there are or how much time it took, and this was before The Fall so tedium hadn’t entered the picture yet. But it is a bit overwhelming how much God is willing to share control with Adam.

As an Image Bearer, God has chosen to share limited control with us. I forget this. More often the narrative is to focus on how God is in control and I had to accept how much is out of my control; I forget how much is in my control.

Even typing this I feel uncomfortable because I’m more familiar thinking of my lack of control. Let’s talk for just a moment about how life in the messy middle might be informing our relationship with control. We all know people who:

  • Have children born with physical or emotional challenges.
  • Systems that are large and impersonal (off the top of my head: schools, hospitals, airlines).
  • Taxes.
  • Feel like there is no end to dishes, schooling, or laundry.
  • Wondering if you’ll get married or growing our family.
  • Work on an assigned team.

All of these are true. And even in Eden, control didn’t mean you get to do what you want at all times.

Today, I’d like for us, like Adam, to name what we do have control over. Where God has formed something and then offered you or your family or your team to have control. While we can’t list all that God has let us control, let’s see how many comments we can get!

A version of this appeared on Velvet Ashes

Community, Faith, God, Learning lessons, Travel

Pebbles of Remembrance

I was sitting outside drinking my morning tea when I noticed a shift had occured.

Pebble of remebrance

This was not a huge aha moment. This was a quiet tuning in to how I felt about an upcoming event and it felt … different. The shift was in a positive direction and nobody but me would notice. On the outside, I’d still attend, I’d still participate, I’d still be present, but I’d enjoy it more than I had been.

Once I noticed it, it kind of surprised me. Wait, the dread isn’t as strong? And what’s that? A twinge of anticipation? 

I know how to mark fairly significant events. Using the language “stones of remembrance” from when the Israelites crossed the Jordan River to capture the big events. The Israelites took 12 stones from the middle of the river, one for each of the tribes, and placed them along the bank to remember what God had done.

But I’ll be honest, this was no stone of remembrance moment. It was not nothing, not something to be brushed aside. But it also wasn’t huge and to call it a stone seemed to be blowing it out of proportion.

It was more like a pebble.

Right there on the spot I saw how the language I use of a stone of remembrance can foster a one-size-fits-all response to events and change.

Here is a stone of remembrance, I am no longer as annoyed by you as I used to be. Not exactly the bridge of friendship, although it may be true.

So I facebook messaged a friend saying, “This message is pebble of remembrance. I’ve noticed this subtle shift within me and it’s not really for public consumption, but I wanted it noted in some way. So by telling you, I’m placing a pebble along my life path.”

I like this idea of pebbles of remembrance. Of having different sizes–pebbles, rocks, stones, and boulders–to mark change or events. It’s freed me up to see what’s there and not feel sheepish if a change or event is not the biggest, most important, most over the top event ever. Not everything needs to be a production.

The flip side is also true: more needs to be noticed and then noted than we think.

Today, look for pebbles in your life. If you notice one and it’s not fit for public consumption, just come back and leave a comment that says “Pebble.” We’ll know what you mean.

 

Community, Faith, God, Holiday, Messy Middle, Relationships

At least 8 Mother’s Day Resources for Churches and {and you}

The teacher in me likes to keep all of my resources together. So I’m gathering

A (mostly) comprehensive list of resources for Mother’s Day — for churches, those who work with kids on Mother’s Day, and YOU

Mother's Day Resources

 

1. 10 ideas for pastors on Mother’s Day — including 6 ideas for a Sunday morning services, a suggestion for those working with kids, and three “avoids.”

 

2. Prayers/Blessing for use:

 

3. Videos for use during a church service:

 

4. For Kids:

  • Please see 10 ideas for pastors on Mother’s Day — and the point on working with kids. Remember not every child will have a mother present. Think ahead of time how your church/activity wants to incorporate this reality.  Don’t be afraid to do something! But don’t be unnecessarily clueless either :).
  • Ideas for Sunday School teachers: see here or here (includes ideas in Spanish)

 

5. Re:think Worship has their own list of resources for Mother’s Day and it includes:

 

6. How to send personalized Mother’s Day cards (tutorial I made AND their customer service is great!)

 

7. Tanya Marlow reminds us the importance for celebrating mothers for who they ARE and not just what they do.

 

8. Remember there will be non-mom’s and those struggling with infertility in your midst.

 

What resources would you like to see added? Here’s a resource for you: 14 Tips for navigating the messy middle of life.

Community, Faith, God, Learning lessons, Relationships

Seven pathways to God {really?}

When cultivating a fertile soul, staying grounded in Christ is a big rock and worth guarding. Part of guarding is knowing yourself and what may or may not work for you; it also involves getting creative and throwing some shoulds out the window. I should read my bible for twenty minutes a day. Or I shouldn’t be too busy to help with the clothing drive at school. Or I should be reading a spiritual book a month.

In God is closer than you think by John Ortberg, he describes seven pathways for people to connect with God. Because each one of us is different, there is no “right” way to access God or (spoiler alert) even better way. That being said, it’s likely that there will be some of the pathways that you more commonly walk on because they are naturally you. One way of knowing a pathway is yours is you feel alive on it and enjoy participating in those types of activities.  Cool to know that while we have preferences, we aren’t limited by them. Who amongst us walks on just one path?

Taken on a walk with a niece who said, "OH, look up!"

Taken on a walk with a niece who said, “OH, look up!”

You will most likely see elements of all of them in your life. The following is a brief description of each and how they may manifest themselves negatively in times of stress or challenge:

1. Intellectual pathway—If this is your pathway, you draw closer to God as you learn more about him. Practices like reading and studying are important because for these people, the way to the heart is through the mind. However, in times of crisis someone on this pathway can go into and analytic or problem solving mode.

2. Relational pathway— If this is your pathway, being with people engages you. You have a deep sense of God’s presence when you’re involved in significant relationships. Ortberg cautions those on this path against two dangers. The first is superficiality from being spread too thin from too many relationships. The second is becoming a spiritual chameleon and relying too much on what others think.

3. Serving pathway—If this is your pathway, how you experience joy is through serving. God’s presence seems most tangible when you’re involved in helping others. The danger is to think that God is only present when they are serving and the temptation is to resent those who don’t serve as much.

4. Worship pathway— If this is your pathway, being involved in worship brings life and you have a natural gift for expression and celebration. Things to guard against are judging those who are not as expressive as you and looking for the next “worship high.”

5. Activist pathway— If this is your pathway, you are passionately aware of God when mobilizing people in a cause. Your passion is to act. A caution for those for whom this is their primary pathway is in your zeal to be aware not to run over or exploit people in your pursuits.

6. Contemplative pathway— If this is your pathway, you have a large inner world and feel presence of God most when alone. God is most present to you when distractions and noises are removed. Because of the reality of modern life and the added pressures that come with transition, you may need permission to follow this pathway. Realize that in times of disappointment and stress you may be tempted to retreat. As John Ortberg said, “Involvement in significant relationships and regular acts of service will help keep you tethered to the external world.”

7. Creation pathway— If this is your pathway, you have a passionate ability to connect with God when you are experiencing the world he made. However, in times of stress and transition guard against using this pathway as an escape or a reason not to connect with others around you.

Reading is another way

As you read over the list probably several of them jumped out to you as natural ways that you connect with God. Is anyone surprised that I lit up about reading?! What you might not know is that after three songs in a worship service I am ready to move on. And the most horrifying verse in all of Christian music?

When we’ve been there ten thousand years
Bright shining as the sun.
We’ve no less days to sing God’s praise
Than when we’ve first begun. 

10,000 years of singing? And that’s just the start?!! I want to run screaming from heaven and the gauntlet of musicians. But then I remind myself this was written by a person who probably loved singing and a verse about 10,000 books might make them vomit.

Other than my fear of singing forever,  I am encouraged to be reminded of how vast and broad our God is in the ways he looks to commune with us! He is gracious to have created such variety in the ways we can connect with him and allows us to mature.

It’s freeing to see that we don’t have to be on all of the above paths. If music is not your thing, that’s OK and more than just OK! Can you imagine if everyone liked to sit around and sing? Who would be out organizing the causes? Who’d be writing books or cooking meals or going on prayer walks?

Reading through the pathways you can see how very much we need them all. Amen? Amen.

31 reminders from Eden, Faith, God, Language of Eden

A picture of God’s heart

And the Lord God planted a garden in Eden, in the east, and there he put the man whom he had formed.  And out of the ground the Lord God made to spring up every tree that is pleasant to the sight and good for food. The tree of life was in the midst of the garden, and the tree of the knowledge of good and evil. A river flowed out of Eden to water the garden, and there it divided and became four rivers.  (Genesis)

The Garden of Eden is, shall we say, the scene of the crime. But before it was marked off with yellow tape and both the perpetrators and victims (one in the same, really) had to leave, this is picture of the original plan for the inhabitants of Eden:

Word cloud for Eden

And as much as we’ve gotten off course, remember, it is still God’s desire for you. Every day. Every situation. Every conversation. Every interaction. Infused with potential for Eden to return through us to a world in need of remembering as well.

Love —Satisfaction—Extravagance—Freedom—Belonging—Recreation—Truth—Trust—Purity—Submission—Stewardship—Unity—Kindness—Blamelessly—With abandon—Acceptance—Celebration—Faith—Generosity—Joy—Purpose—Empathy—Rhythm—Hope—Elation—Esteem—Healthy—Peace—Secure (in our being)—Wanted/Desired/Picked/Seen.

How has this overall series impacted you and your soul?

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Every comment this week will be added to a drawing  on SUNDAY (I changed my mind and have a post for Sunday night) for a set of Holly’s cards (your choice). Following Janet and Holly’s generosity on this project, every comment will be an entry. If you wonder what we’re up to this week, we’re sitting on benches :). 

Faith, God, Learning lessons, Messier than normal

How to treat a burn when it’s relational {vintage}

I’ve had a crazy week :).Combine distance of the training center I worked at this week (teacher from Guangdong, so fun!) and Beijing traffic and you’ve got a recipe that results in leaving the house one morning at 6:30 and being 15 minutes late to an 8:20 a.m. class. True story. So instead of slapping a post together, here’s one from last June. Thanks for understanding! Amy

*******

While cooking lunch this spring, a colleague’s gas stove had a mini-explosion and she experienced second degree burns. Watching the process of treating physical burns had me wondering if similar lessons could be applied to less-literal, though not less-damaging burns.

Because we live in Eden Lost, we know what it’s like to be burnt by one another (and sadly how to use our words and actions to burn others).  We can experience first, second and third degree relational burns.

Want to know how creative we have gotten at burning one another? Here is a short list of burn victims:

  • Esau – burnt by his brother and mother
  • Jacob—burnt by his father-in-law
  • Blind man – by gossip (was it his sin or his parents’)
  • David – burnt by Saul … again and again
  • Uriah – burned by his commander-in-chief, David
  • Moses—burnt by those he was leading
  • Naomi –burnt by life’s experiences (famine, relocating, death of loved ones and desires)
  • Tamar—burnt by her brother
  • Jesus—burnt by a kiss from a friend (and really, us all!)
  • Elijah—burnt by exhaustion
  • Mary—burnt by words said against her son
  • Mary and Martha—burnt by the delayed response of Jesus
  • Jeremiah—burnt by people’s non-responsiveness
  • Joseph—burnt by his brothers, later his employer’s wife, and later still by someone who forgot him
  • Jonah—burnt by perceived unfairness of God

Burnt by family, the government, leaders, friends, strangers, those we are to serve, life experiences, gossip, even at times it seems by God. This is most definitely not an exhaustive list and as you read this, you could add your own name and way of being burnt to it.

Among those listed, we know that not all healed from their injuries. Healing, sadly, is not a given. However, there are –I want to avoid over simplifying the process – actions that we can borrow from treating a physical burn and apply them to emotional and relational burns.

  1. Admit you’ve been burnt. This seems too obvious to state, but if you don’t admit that something has happened, you will live with this wound, that though others may not see, they will know something has happened to you.
  2. Get help – at times this will involve professionals. If you’ve gotten a second or third degree burn you are probably going to need expertise beyond your mom, school nurse, or good friend.
  3. Your wound will need to be cleaned out and this may involve scraping off dead skin. If you don’t scrap, you run the risk of infection that could spread beyond the original area wounded.
  4. It will hurt to clean and re-bandage the wounds, but you will need to do this on a regular basis until healing occurs.
  5. Monitor for signs of infection and be faithful in taking antibiotics.
  6. Lean hard into community. Let them cook for you, carry you, and spend time with you. Do not feel that you need to reach out to them at that time.
  7. The process might take a lot more time than you would choose. I’m sorry.
  8. As you do one through seven, pray. In the Psalms David models howling out to God in the midst of life’s trials while weaving in God’s faithfulness and David’s dependence on God. You can do likewise.

Physical burns need to be treated immediately, the main change I’d make to relational burns is that the timing of treating it probably will start later and go longer.

I don’t want to minimize the real pain and loss that burning causes, whether by the sun, by cooking, or by the hands of another. But God has not abandoned us in Eden lost and you can heal and out of your experience, minister to others in their time of need. {And if you’ve burnt someone, it is never too late to confess and repent.}

Question: what’s helped you heal from a relational burn?

Related article:  Five lessons from rehab

Faith, God, Learning lessons

In which I am reminded that God is awesome and I am not

Let’s play a game. OK? Guess which two words it turns out I say considerably more often than I realized?

One of my teammates is precious two-and-a-half year old Nathan and we have a special bond (though you might not sense that in the following interactions).

**************

Amy: Wow, this is an awesome piece of cake!

Nathan (snaps): Only GOD is awesome.

Amy: Gosh, you’re right!

Nathan, with great disgust: You shouldn’t say gosh.

Amy: Right again, little buddy.

*************

An example of God’s awesomeness

 

Amy (to another adult): Gosh that would be awesome!

Nathan (barks): Only GOD is awesome and you shouldn’t say gosh.

Amy: Oh Nathan, you’re right God is awesome and I shouldn’t be saying that other word.

***********

Amy (you’re beginning to wonder how slow I am): Have an awesome time.

Nathan (from the other side of the room): Only GOD is awesome!

Amy (to self): Well your hearing seems to be pretty awesome too.

***********

It only took one meal next to a two-year-old to make the point that my vocabulary is not awesome, nor am I very tuned in to the words that come out of my mouth. Out of the mouths of babes, or two-year-olds or donkeys, comes truth.

Who (or what) has an Awesome God been using to refine you recently?

China, God, Holiday, Learning lessons, Messier than normal

Crowds, Compassion and Small Mercies

I had left with plenty of time to get to the train station, headed home to Beijing.

And then there were no empty cabs. Strange at this time of day. No worries, plenty of time.

And then one, two, three, four, five empty cabs passed me, waving me off. Worry creeping in.

And then a black cab (private driver) stopped by but shewed me off with a “no way lady” hand gesture at the mention of the train station. And then another waved me off.

Surely you feel it too, the anxiety rising.

I sent a Hail Mary text to three teammates: Pray. No cabs. May miss my train.

Normally not a big deal to miss a train, but on a holiday weekend where Friday is Sunday and the whole country is mobilized to sweep the tombs of their ancestors and enjoy the presence of their living relatives … it was becoming A. VERY. BIG. DEAL.

Will do, came the replies.

Am very stressed, I texted as I took my eyes of off traffic for a brief minute.

Could tell. 

OK, so I’m as subtle as a heart attack. And then, then another black cab slowed down and offered a rate only 5 rmb (about a dollar) over the real rate to go to the train station. I was so flooded with adrenaline and text prayers and was willing to pay anything to get to the train station and he offered me the kindness of only a buck more? Small mercy gladly received.

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Am in black cab!!!!! There is time to make my train, but the margin in slim. Keep praying. I hate holiday traffic.

And then we swung by a bus stop and picked up two more passengers. Oh China. Oh black cabs. Oh traffic please part like the Jordan River.

You know that sense when you have no idea how far away you are from the train station, bus stop or airport so you can’t sense how urgent (or not) the situation may be? Then you are in that cab with me, along with teammates who distracted with texts laced with humor, concern, and other stories. And then finally I saw a street sign that said “train station.”

Here. Grateful. Now to face crowds! Elbows ready.

Oh to have time to stop and be present in the moment. To photograph the women lying down, their small bags used as pillows. To absorb the size of the crowd and be in awe of the sheer mass of humanity. To gaze at the faces of travelers and wonder at their stories.

It was awesome and horror inducing in one fell swoop. There were so many people. So many. So many. I shoved to the line outside the train station that said “your train is already boarding” by-passing the hordes in the massive lines to my right (and joining other crazed travelers. Let’s just say the elbows were flying and we all understood why!).

Made it in. Luggage x-rayed. Board scanned and gate number located. Escalator ridden. Hall traversed. Ticket handed. Car found. Seat collapsed into. Train moving eight minutes later.

He looked out and had compassion on the crowds.

To imagine that He knew and cared for every single person in that train station is staggering and yet it is true! I see a mass that I cannot begin to fully comprehend and He sees each and every face and knows each and every story and is compassionate.

Had I missed my train would I still see the compassion? Hopefully I would have recognized it. In different ways (and with more initial fussing!), but there were people I had just left who were texting me as well and had I needed to return to them, there would have been open arms, a warm bed, and compassionate responses.

But on that day, I got the happy ending.

Thanks be to God for the traveling companions and small mercies extended along the journey.

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